Literature 1999. Written by Chuck Palahniuk.
Source Features: BBB (102) TIMELINE (3) MAP (2) QUOTES (14) TRIVIA (3) THEMES (1)
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Total Record Results: 14 - Medium: LITERATURE / Group: OTHER / Category: QUOTES
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1Fertility Hollis QuotesQuotes

Fertility Hollis
Fertility Hollis: If you worry about disaster all the time, that's what you're going to get.

2Tender Branson QuotesQuotes

Tender Branson
Tender Branson: A girl calls and asks, "Does it hurt very much to die?" Well, sweetheart, I tell her, yes, but it hurts a lot more to keep living.

3Tender Branson QuotesQuotes

Tender Branson
Tender Branson: A man calls to say his car won't start. Kill yourself. A woman calls to ask what time the late movie starts. Kill yourself. She asks, "Isn't this 555-1327? Is this the Moorehouse CinePlex?" I say, Kill yourself. Kill yourself. Kill yourself.

4Tender Branson QuotesQuotes

Tender Branson
Tender Branson: A woman calls and says her kids won't behave. Without missing a beat, I tell her, Kill yourself.

5Tender Branson QuotesQuotes

Tender Branson
Tender Branson: I'm on a toilet in the Miami airport, and right at my elbow there's the hole in the stall wall, and all around the hole are messages left by men who sat here before me. John M was here 3/14/64. Carl B was here Jan. 8, 1976. Epitaphs.

6Tender Branson QuotesQuotes

Tender Branson
Tender Branson: I've just about perfected a failsafe technique for mopping up extra sage cream when the phone rings, again. A guy's calling to say he's failing Algebra II. Just as a point of practice, I say, Kill yourself.

7Tender Branson QuotesQuotes

Tender Branson
Tender Branson: May our efforts bring all those around us to heaven.

8Tender Branson QuotesQuotes

Tender Branson
Tender Branson: May you be of complete service in your lifetime.

9Tender Branson QuotesQuotes

Tender Branson
Tender Branson: May you die with all your work complete.

10Tender Branson QuotesQuotes

Tender Branson
Tender Branson: People need to know the Book of Very Common Prayer was not my idea. Yes, it sold two hundred million copies, worldwide. It did. Yes, I let them put my name on it, but the book was the agent's brainchild. Before that the book was the idea of some nobody on the writing team. Some copywriter trying to break into the big time, I forget.

11Tender Branson QuotesQuotes

Tender Branson
Tender Branson: Praise and glory to the for this day through which we labor.

12Tender Branson QuotesQuotes

Tender Branson
Tender Branson: This is fish number 641 in a lifetime of goldfish. My parents bought me the first one to reach me about loving and caring for another living breathing creature of God. 640 fish later, the only thing I know is, everything you love will die.

13Tender Branson QuotesQuotes

Tender Branson
Tender Branson: When we were on the ground and the passengers and crew were deplaning, I stood at the forward cabin door and said, I'm sorry. I apologize for any inconvenience. Please have a safe and enjoyable trip and thank you for flying Blah-Blah Airlines.

14Tender BransonQuotesQuotes

Tender Branson
Tender Branson: You're gone anaerobic, you're burning muscle instead of fat, but your mind is crystal-clear. The truth is that all this was just part of the suicide process. Because tanning and steroids are only a problem if you plan to live a long time. Because the only difference between a suicide and a martyrdom really is the amount of press coverage.


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